I know I'm not supposed to be writing (because of my whole official leave of absence and all), but I've gotten tired of pretending to study and now need something else to do.
So here I am!
Anyway... Below I have listed 5 reasons why I should probably drop out of college.
1. I am sitting here blogging right now instead of working on my finals: the mark of someone who is destined to fail at just about EVERYTHING.
2. I have the attention span of a hamster.
3. Last time I checked, hamsters are not allowed to enroll in Universities.
4. Due to the fact that I am very talented and charming, I could probably make a generous living entering (and winning) beauty pageants instead of wasting my time getting an education.
5. I just had to fix the word "pageants" in number 4 with Spellcheck, because I didn't know how to spell it, an obvious sign that I am not intelligent enough for college.
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Well, there you have it. In all honesty, I find it a bit unfair that my Professors expect so much from a human/hamster/LOSER hybrid like myself. I should be spending my time doing proper things like running in my exercise ball and eating sunflower seeds. It is very insensitive of them to ask otherwise.
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