To my Dear Friends in Latvia......

Just yesterday, it came to my attention while browsing my blog's statistics, that I am now the proud owner of an internationally acclaimed site. That's right, unlike my slightly less famous or well-known viewers, I am a renowned author now, known all over the world for my revolutionary and inspirational writings! It's a tough life being so famous, but someone has to do it, I suppose.

Anyway, as I was saying, just a day ago, I discovered to my great delight, that I now have one blog view from LATVIA of all places! And although it's perhaps 90% possible that this one viewing from across the world was just a mistake, and that someone accidentally clicked on my site while googling beards or vampires or the future and then (after realizing that they had just stumbled upon a crap blog) quickly navigated away, I choose not to believe this. I think it was fate. And I think that my one Latvian viewer is probably out there right now, staring at his or her computer screen, counting down the moments until my next blog post and refreshing the screen over and over and over again with great vigor. And that is what I believe.

I have always loved the Latvians, after all. They are one of the world's greater races, and that is why I am dedicating this blog post to the noble souls of Latvia- particularly the one, saintly viewer who sometime in the last week actually looked at my blog. I love you more than words can express.

Anyway, out of a place of deep intimacy and tenderness with my Latvian brethren, I have decided to write them a poem, to better express their venerable place in the deepest folds of my heart. To Latvia!

Ode to Latvia

Oh, Latvia, you make my heart swell with passion.

For your Baltic people are all of high fashion.

Without your friendship, my face will turn ashen;

my feelings for you, I cannot even ration.

And though your climate is remarkably humid,

you love cheese and folk music, which is not-at-all stupid.

A word to describe you would NOT be putrid,

for your people shower regularly in nice, clean fluid.

If I could pick one country in the world to dispose of,

it would not be Latvia that I would let go of.

But probably a lesser country whom I do not so love!

For my dear friends in Latvia, I could never give the shove.

To Latvia: my favorite unitary parliamentary land!

I now feel a joy I could never withstand.

If I were a king, you would be at my right hand.

To Latvia! To liberty! Forever will you stand!

Fin.

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Latvia: you have pierced my heart in a way you cannot comprehend. If I ever become fabulously wealthy and end up ruling the world with an iron fist, you can rest assured that I will spare you and your people.

Cheers,

Your friend from America,

Brianna.