Greetings from my Sickbed!

Yes, that's right, I am indeed sick! It's such great fun. What with the throbbing headaches, sudden temperature shifts, and inability to move without aching, I can hardly think of a greater way to spend my day! In addition, all of this lying around has given me an excellent opportunity to brush up on my fake cheerfulness and sarcasm... Yeah!!! Anyways, amidst my feverish Bed of Pain, I have decided to put my solid dedication to blogging to good practice, so even though my head is throbbing and I may die any minute, I am sacrificially taking the efforts to write this post. I hope that the world appreciates it.

So anyways, in celebration of being feverish and ill, I have decided to lighten the mood by googling a list of strange diseases to make me feel better about my current pathetic state. I have listed below a few of my favorites..

1. Human Werewolf Syndrome: a condition that causes people to grow hair all over their faces... I recommend googling images of this disease; you will find an amusing mix of really harry people and Taylor Lautner portraits.
2. Blue Skin Disorder: It's exactly what it sounds like! People with this disease simply have blue skin.... nothing else is wrong with them. They live completely normal lives, the only difference being that they can camouflage slightly better with the sky or water or large tubs of blackberry jam. Abilities like this could give the upper hand in, say, a game of hide and seek at a jam factory. I see many practical perks to this disease.
3. Vampire Disease: This one should hardly even be considered an ailment, as I can instantly think of at least a good 10 million or so preteen girls that would sell their souls to be infected. Anyways, people with vampire disease actually have skin that blisters in the sunlight- every Twilight fan's dream! Unfortunately, only a few are lucky enough to contract it. In addition, a victim also has the uncanny ability to turn into a bat upon will. Or um... something like that...
4. Pica: This basically makes people want to eat things that aren't food. Dirt, paper glue, clay.... When I googled this one, I found a picture of a boy with a frog in his mouth. I have no idea if he was actually ill or if he just liked eating frogs, but either way, I was mildly disturbed.
5. Jumping Frenchman Disorder: ahhhhahaa I didn't even read the description of this one. I just liked the name a lot. I assume, though, that the ailment would forcibly cause victims to jump around in striped shirts with baguettes and hearty french accents. I could read about what the disease actually is, but that would ruin my really great mental picture.

Anyways.... I wish I had more exciting things to blog about, but as I am bedridden and ill and knocking on Death's door, I really have nothing better to say. On the bright side, I have been heartily cheered by the fact that although I am sick, at least I do not have blue skin, a lot of hair, blisters, and a bad frog-eating habit.

Things could be worse, I suppose.